Did I Say That Out Loud?

Childhood Confessions, Part 2

2007-07-04T21:14:00Z

So as a kid I would often do things just to see what would happen. For example, I had an obsession with fire for a while (age 6 or 7)that resulted in the fire dept. getting called a few times and have scars on my body to prove it, I would mix things from under the sink together and smell them, etc. Basically I'm lucky to have made it and should be the poster boy for child safety anything.

When I was about 7 or 8 and had just moved to L.A. my dad bought me a hamster. I named him Sam, short for Samantha from Who's the Boss (Alyssa Milano) on whom I apparently had a big crush at the time (during my fire phase my main crushes were Drew Barrymore [Firestarter had just come out. Co-incidence?] and Chee-tah from the Thundercats--I was a strange kid). I had to clean his cage every weekend so I'd take it outside to this little empty lot next to our house that was a little Eucalyptus grove. One time I decided to see "what would happen" if I filled his water bottle with urine instead of water. We're all adults now so we all know what happened: my poor little genderqueer hamster died a few days later.

It didn't sink in until a few weeks later that the two (urinebottle/hamsterdeath) were connected. I only think I've told about two people this and I was in my late teens. Time to let this one go.

Thanks, livejournal.

I drank last night and feel sluggish this morning. Drinking's getting really old. I wanna get addicted to sobriety.

Childhood Confessions Part 1

2007-05-02T08:22:12Z

Once when I was about eight or nine I was on the toilet and after wiping noticed a can of Lysol behind me on the tank. I read the can and it said, "disenfects and deoderizes" so I thought, "perfect!" I knew by then that buttholes were full of bacteria and I definitely knew they could be a source of bad odors, so I decided to....you guessed it, I sprayed some of it all up in there. I'll never forget the sting. I'll also never forget the embarassment of having my Dad run into the bathroom thinking something awful had happened, then trying to feign concern and sympathy when all he wanted to do was laugh. Well, Dad--Laugh away. I'm right here with ya.

I tried to post a picture of a can of Lysol above the post but after fifteen minutes of trying unsuccessfully I give up. I do have a photobucket account now. Oh, and I'm now the proud owner of a shiny computer for the first time in my life. In your face, Unabomber!!!

Hear that?

2007-04-03T07:34:17Z

That's the sound of my livejournal (is that one word?) cherry being popped.

What does one write here? What I did today? Yawn. My hopes and dreams? Why does anyone care about what perfect strangers ate for breakfast in the morning? I guess that's what I'm here to figure out. I used to think that things like this were for anti-social people to ease their loneliness. Now, having met some fairly well-adjusted folks who make the most of sites like this, I'm not too sure.

It's been an early Spring in San Francisco-- I love it. People shedding their scarves and scowls, feeling good about themselves and letting their guards down, feeling hopeful. I've been spending every (rare) free moment I have in the park. It's like being in Germany again.

I haven't drunk in over five weeks and it's amazing. One week to go and it's back to the bars, I guess, but it's been so nice to take a step back and just observe. I always think I'm kind of an idiot when I drink, but so many of my friends have tried to get me to drink again I must be somewhat amusing. I've started seeing someone in the last few weeks and i have a feeling alcoholism being thrown into the mix is either going to make or break it. I hope for the former.

O.K., L.J. homies. Naked pics to follow.